God has told his people, “Here is a place of rest; let the weary rest here. This is a place of quiet rest.” But they would not listen. Isaiah 28:12 (New Living Translation)
Why do we carry heavy things in a hurry?
I am yet to see anyone or group of people manually lift and/or move something heavy with panache. Even very delicate items, though done with caution, are not carried in style as long as they are too heavy for the person lifting them. If you have to lift a heavy sack say, from a car to a building, you would not do it in slow motion. You would hardly mind if anyone was watching, no matter how short the distance; you would instinctively take very quick steps.
Why?
Because you want to get rid of the weight as fast as you can. Because it is not funny to be belaboured. Because you would rather have your comfort, peace and joy back than extend the discomfort, exasperation and even pain from lifting and moving a heavy weight around.
Now I ask, “Why do you not apply the same principle to emotional weights? Why do you not carry them in a hurry and drop them quickly???”
Selah…
Drop them where? You ask.
In prayer. Tell the Lord exactly how you feel and why you feel that way and that you do not wish to continue feeling that way. It may be a simple payer such as ‘Lord I just learnt my daughter did ---- and ---- and I feel betrayed/slighted/hurt/…. I had hoped my many words of wisdom would have gained some ground in her heart and prevented such an outburst/behaviour/reaction… from her but…. I still find it hard to believe, I am in shock…. Lord please take this feeling away, help me find peace, give me a Word, encourage me Lord, hold my hands, wrap me in your arms, lift this pain, soothe this hurt, wipe these tears… only You can erase every trace of it Lord, I do not want to ever feel this way again. Give me the wisdom to handle and approach this situation in the best way, show me what to do, tell me what to say (if I have to)…. Lord I lean on your own understanding… You are faithful and just… I trust You wholeheartedly…’
You could also talk to a Mentor, a ‘safe’ Friend/Counsellor (someone who would not judge you), a Sibling, a trusted Elder, etc, depending on the gravity of the hurt. This is not absolutely necessary especially if you have already prayed about it and feel your strength and peace restored. Talking about it with someone who understands is therapeutic on its own even if it sometimes does not lead to the end of the problem. But it sure helps make the burden lighter to bear and holds up your faith.
Do not brood on it. Once you’ve prayed about it, stop replaying it in your head/mind. It’s like playing a computer game and putting on repeat the part where your opponent crushes you, only that you are the one with the remote control. Stop reenacting a hurtful scene or scenes in your consciousness over and over again. Stop hurting yourself. Learn the lessons in the experience and move on. Easier said than done, yes, but very achievable.
If you must, have a heart-to-heart with the person directly involved. If from past experience you however feel that chatting with the person about the issue would not yield much fruit, then you may not bother. In that case, be mature about it and let it go. If you decide to discuss it and the person decides to argue it through, don’t join in, let it be. If the person is pliant and you both work it out, great! Your relationship will be the better for it. But by all means, don’t insist on ‘talking your mind’, if it will only make things worse.
By all means Child of God, if you will not carry a heavy load slowly and will often rush to drop it off as soon as you can, do not carry an emotional load longer than is necessary. You do not deserve to suffer, 'ye are gods'.
Sista Mercie
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